Bullying
can happen everywhere and to anyone. Majority of Canadians believe that
bullying should be a crime. A lot of bullies today get away with bullying there
victim and have no punishments.
Children
all across the world are being bullied every single day. Victims throughout the
years have committed suicide or have been seriously injured. Children are
either too scared, nervous or shy to confront the bullies and to tell/report to
an adult.
Bullying
is just not someone punching you in the face or calling you names. It's much
more than that. There are 6 types of bullying. Physical bullying is when there
is physical contact that would hurt or injure the victim, Verbal bullying is
when there is name calling or making offensive comments, Indirect bullying
includes spreading rumors or stories, Social alienation is when someone
excludes someone from a group, Intimidation is when the bully threatens the
victim and last but not least Cyber bullying is done involving with the internet.
Also
crime isn't just a murder, robbery or something illegal. It can also be the
abuse of victims suffering from pain everyday in their life. Bullying is also
not an offense in Canada, but often behaviors like harassment, threats and
mischief can lead into criminal charges.
Here's
a short story of a 15 year old girl: Phoebe Prince hanged herself on Jan.
14, allegedly after being bullied at school. Nine classmates have been charged,
raising the question of whether bullying is a crime.
Bullying
is a key that opens no lock. I believe that bullying should be a crime. No one
deserves to be bullied or be committing suicide. Everyone deserves to be
treated equally. Imagine a child's life taken away by committing suicide and
the bullies have no punishment at all because there young. I'm glad that there
is Anti Bullying day where everyone who chooses to support the cause wears
Pink. It's a great way to spread the word that bullying needs to stop! Bullies
should have consequences because they will know who much damage or pain they
did to the victim.
My
sources:
- http://library.thinkquest.org/07aug/00117/typesbullying.html
- http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/02/29/even-non-violent-bullying-should-be-a-crime-canadians-tell-poll/
- http://www.stopbullying.gov/
- http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/TheLaw/teens-charged-bullying-mass-girl-kill/story?id=10231357#.T8_eslIbEWk
Interesting post! Yet, I love it! Great format and Grammar. I really enjoyed reading your opinion on how minors should still be charged and punished for making young individuals want to hurt themselves and/or commit suicide. Sure, society today doesn't think that bullying is as extreme as it really is. In my opinion I believe that bullying is just as bad as murdering someone. I don't believe in the statement that " children don't know any better" because really, they do! Bullying is the same as threatening someone and abusing any individual no matter how old you are or how old your "prey" might be. I think that anyone caught bullying someone, and leading that individual to cause harm to themselves should be classed as a juvenile delinquency and should be put into juvy. Those who cause thought of suicide or harm to any individual depending on how rough the bullying turns out to be should then be charged depending on what harm they have caused. It makes no sense to me why bullying isn't classed as abuse in society today. It's the same thing just with younger individuals. I completely agree with your opinion on bullying being the same and maybe worse than a crime itself. Great Job!
ReplyDeleteGreat job on using information in this post, shanese. I liked how you included that true story in there; it's makes your readers more aware of just how serious bullying has gotten.
ReplyDeleteI didn't find many spelling or grammer mistakes. However, one thing popped out at me, you used the wrong "there." Using the wrong "there" is a common mistake, so don't worry too much. You're a really smart girl, so I bet you just did it by accident. :) I also found your post was a little to factual. What I mean by that is you didn't include your opinion in much of it. It was mostly just straight forward lines, such as "Majority of Canadians believe that bullying should be a crime." Lastly, perhaps it could have been a tiny bit longer? You didn't include a ton of your opinion in it, and I am still a little unsure of what your message is.
But other than all that stuff, this is a great post! I can really tell that you're improving, and you finished it on time too---yay! I strongly agree with you that bullying is a crime, and there should be consequences that come with it.
Wow! Great post, Shanese! :) As mentioned above, I liked how you included a true story so it lets everyone know that it could happen to them because many people think that it's just other people's problems. I also referred to the six different types of bullying in mine too! This shows me that you did some research which makes your essay very infomative! :) Your overall essay included the multi-paragraph form and there weren't any spelling errors as far as I know. I agree with you that the bullies should get punished because it is clearly a crime.
ReplyDeleteI hardly found any grammer mistakes but maybe you could've combined some of the paragraphs together. Some paragraphs just had the minimum amount of sentences in them. (3 sentences) I think that you could've linked two of them together, such as the first two paragraphs. Other than that, Olivia has covered most of the things that you could improve on.
Overall, it was a great post to end your grade eight blogging experience! You have improved so much this year. I'm very proud of you, Shanese! :)
Thanks everyone for the feedback! :)
ReplyDelete